I feel like I shouldn't..

As the Admin I feel like I shouldn't talk about when I am having a bad time, I don't know why. It's like that on my other site...well, it was like that at first. Now it does not matter so much.
Pretty much I just am never going to be happy with myself, no matter what I think. I can be wonderfully happy with someone, I can handle love, I can handle being with friends...you know? People can make me happy. But being alone is what I can't handle. When I am alone I feel ugly, worthless, horrible, things like that. I really don't know what I am supposed to do about it. If I am alone long enough I don't know if I could trust myself enough not to do something stupid. Is it just me?

Is it wrong of me to say all of this?

I dont know..I guess I just wanna feel like I am not the only one.

It is not wrong for you to use the forums like this.

Self thoughts can be changed over time, you need to listen for when they start and either stop them starting or change them for something else. Easier said than done but give it a try for a few months.

You are not alone hon. I am struggling to stop hating myself too. I can tell you that you can change those thoughts and feelings about yourself. I have changed most of them. I dont truly hate most of me anymore.
Definitely use the forum. Nobody assumes the administrator or mods are perfect. I actually feel better knowing that I am on a site where everyone understands that the hardest battles for me are the ones I fight on the inside. I feel less self conscious knowing that my battles are similar to others battles. It makes it easier to share. Please keep sharing. We can help, support and learn from eachother. I think that is the beauty and point of sites like this

Thank you so much. I think when I sleep and just try to stay motivated, I will be ok again. Its just hard to start, you know? And you're right lyc, I will try my best.

today I feel ugly.
and I feel unimportant.

but I will think I am beautiful.
And believe I am special.

thats the goal today

Don't feel guilty for posting, I'm sure everyone understands that you are not perfect.


As for how you are feeling today....I think you are very important (example: you creaed two amazing helpful websites!) and you are beautiful.

Just try to stay positive. They say if you force yourself to smile that after a while, it will make you feel better.

I hope it works. I am trying but I know I have friends like you all to help when I dont wanna

I'll tape the corners of your mouth up and make you smile!

yeah i wish i didnt believe you lol

awe, I'm the biggest weird-o you know

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz